3 Times You Need to Take Control in Your Relationship

Most of the time, you want your bond with him to be an even give and take. But experts say there are a couple of specific situations when you need to take the reigns. Here they are...

You Want to Have “The Talk”
Say you’ve been dating for a while and aren’t seeing anyone else, but you haven’t had the boyfriend/girlfriend convo yet so you aren’t sure where you stand. Your best bet is to be blunt because guys just don’t pick up on subtlety, says Diana Kirschner, PhD. Tell him that you think you’re unbelievable together, but you need to know where you two stand because you’re looking for lasting love and if he’s not then you need to be aware of that. We’re not saying to give him an ultimatum, but just let him know what’s important to you when it comes to your love.

He Has Totally Dropped the Romance
It’s Friday night and you’re stationed in front of the TV watching Tosh.0...again. “If you’ve been together for a while, guys sometimes forget they need to woo you” says Kirschner. To get him back in the romantic groove, you’ll have to give him some inspiration. Plan an amazing Saturday night out with all things you wish he’d do for you—candlelit dinner, lovey-dovey walk through the park, whatever. At the end, tell him that next week is his turn to plan. Once he’s reminded how much you enjoy evenings like that, he’ll get back into the game and start planning sweet, sexy things for you two to do.

The Sex Has Become Routine
Has it been a little less than thrilling in the bedroom recently? You’re getting off, but he’s not trying anything new or exciting. That’s actually pretty common with couples who have been together for a while. See, once a guy finds moves that make you climax, he’s afraid to veer away from those and risk you not having an orgasm. The next time he goes into auto-pilot, whisper something naughty you want to try into his ear and tell him how much it would turn you on to try it, says Marty Klein, PhD. By telling him in the moment, not way before, he won’t have time to worry about whether or not the move will work or if he’ll do it right. He’ll be so caught up in the heat of the moment that’ll he try almost anything you tell him to.

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