Some Resolutions for your Relationship in 2012

Almost everyone I know makes goals or intentions related to their business, and many people make resolutions related to health and fitness. But how many of you make resolutions for your relationships?

Relationships are arguably the most important aspect of a person’s life. Even if you’re not currently in a romantic relationship, you have relationships with friends, family (if you’re lucky) and co-workers or colleagues. You can’t live in the world without having relationships, and relationships take work. Just like your business or your health, relationships thrive when you put your positive attention and energy into them.

Here are Some Resolutions for your Relationship in 2012

Resolve to treat yourself better this year
Whether that means putting healthy food in your body, getting more sleep or being more compassionate with yourself for your perceived shortcomings. Start the new year by treating yourself as you’d like others to treat you and watch how your relationships change. 25 Simple Self-Care Habits For A Happier Love Life

Resolve to decide which of your relationships are most important to you
Try this: take a piece of paper and a draw as large of a circle as will fit on the page. Inside the circle, draw two concentric, smaller circles (like a bulls-eye). The smallest circle in the center represents your "A" relationships: those which nurture you, make you feel better about yourself and support you. The second circle represents your "B" relationships. These relationships are good, but not as important as the inner circle. Last, the outer ring represents your "C" relationships. These are people you can’t or don’t want to cut contact with, but they’re not supportive relationships (toxic relatives fall in this category).

Resolve to spend quality time with the people you’ve decided are most important to you
Talk with each of the people in your "A" circle and together decide how you want to nurture your relationship with each other. This requires a commitment on your part. It requires a resolution to stay focused on the relationships that nurture you. Are you willing to make that resolution?

Resolve to say NO to demands on your time from people who don’t support you
This is a little more difficult than spending time with people you love who support you. This resolution may mean that you limit contact with a toxic parent or sibling. It may mean that you finally end the romantic relationship that’s not moving in the direction you desire. Are you willing to make that resolution?

For romantic relationships, resolve to hug your partner every day for at least 20 seconds
That’s about how long it takes for oxytocin to start flowing through your system, making you feel closer to your partner. Oxytocin, also known as the "cuddle hormone", works to make you feel better about people you...yup... cuddle with. Especially when you’ve been with someone for a long time, cuddling can fall to the bottom of the priority list.

Romantic relationships need more than just cuddle time
One of the pitfalls of long term relationships is that the sizzle starts to fizzle. While oxytocin will help you feel more loving toward your partner, it won’t keep eroticism alive. For that, you need to resolve to get your sexy on. I’ve written volumes on different ways to bring the sexy back into your long term relationship, and you can find them on my blog here. If you’re short for time or can't tear yourself away from this page, my first tip is to initiate sex every single day for seven days. Yes, that's right. I said have sex for seven days in a row with your partner. You'll be amazed what happens when you do. Hugs Not Sex Will Save Your Relationship

Lastly, resolve to be kind to strangers
Technically, according to most common understandings of relationships, you’re not in a relationship with a stranger. Yet, this resolution will create a more powerful impact than you might imagine because the truth is that we are all in relationships with ourselves, our loved ones, those we consider enemies and with people we don’t know. Kindness toward strangers (and animals) is considered to be one of the measures of a great soul. If you want a truly amazing 2012, resolve to be kind to strangers.

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